There’s a quiet truth many carers carry but rarely say out loud.
Sometimes caring for someone with dementia makes you angry.
Not angry at them.
Angry at the situation.
Angry that the person you love is slowly disappearing while still sitting right in front of you.
Angry that your life now revolves around medication times, repeated questions, and constant vigilance.
And then the guilt arrives.
Because carers are supposed to be patient.
Loving.
Calm.
But carers are also human.
Dementia care creates a strange kind of grief.
You are grieving someone who is still alive.
The conversations change.
The personality shifts.
The memories fade.
And with every small change comes another quiet goodbye.
That’s why carers need their village.
Not because they are weak.
But because this journey was never meant to be walked alone.
A village might be:
A sister who phones every Sunday.
A neighbour who brings soup.
A support group that understands the strange mixture of love and exhaustion.
And sometimes the village is simply permission to feel what you feel without shame.
Angela Watkins – Editor, Pensioners Forum